Day 2 – An Epic

After turning in several thoroughly dominating performances on Day One, it was time to sustain the success on Day Two. Some sore muscles suggested otherwise, but it was time to throw down in the mass start skate race, 10 km for women and 15 for the men. The course in Orangeville is considered fairly narrow for a skate race, but that was not going to stop the UW team and just meant a more interesting and exciting start. Again the coaching staff had worked long and laborious hours to get the wax right. Based on the skis provided the day before in the relay, expectations were high. The coaches kept the wax a closely guarded secret, under constant harassment and torture from rival coaches (Rumour has it they were using EPO as glide wax, however it is still a rumour at this point, as torture has not unveiled the answer as of yet…)

The women were the first to go and give the beat down to the course. The mass start went off without any major issues, a pair of sunglasses being the only casualty. After two quick laps of the course, the women were in. Alison Stephenson was Waterloo’s only representation in this race and had a solid race. She managed to do the all important beating your bib number and came in 22^nd.

Then it was on to the men’s race, where utter dominance was anticipated by superstar Henry Reich, Andrew Jeffrey and the rest of the Waterloo team. Reich and Jeffrey had set themselves up nicely to All-Star at the championship based on their Day One results, and were looking to improve their positions. Tim Rhodes was able to find his way to the start line on time for this race, which perhaps signified good things to come. Ryan McNamara was looking to use the fact that he is a skate specialist to move up in the standings. Derek Hartman decided that perhaps the press box was a better place for him, after coming off the IR for the classic race.

Therefore the team and the rest of the men’s field were ready and raring to go. Again, the race was off without much of a hitch. Unlike the previous day in the relay, there were no epic crashes.

After a fair bit of jostling for position on the first lap, the men settled into the race focused on getting through the remainder. Henry Reich used fast skis and perseverance to outpace those who had skied around him the entire race and finish in 4^th place. Andrew Jeffrey also used fast skis to beat some other skiers of a close rival, whose team is not to be named, down the hill and into the finish in 10^th. Tim Rhodes used determination to pass a large portion of the field into 22^nd place. Ryan McNamara blew by many classic specialists to finish in 31^st.

With those solid finishing positions, Henry was the 3^rd overall male and an All-Star. He was joined by Andrew Jeffrey who turned in a solid 7^th overall place, to go with their relay gold from the previous day. With those results, the two are off to Nationals, which will be held in Whitehorse in early March.

Stay tuned and stay classy San Diego…

Day 1 – Golden Boys!

Canadian cross country skiers were excited with 4 men in the Top 16 in the Olympic Pursuit, otherwise known as the greatest day in Canadian male cross country skiing history, but the OUA Men weren’t going to let that overshadow them. So without further ado, from the UWNN team on the ground in Orangeville, a report, poetry-style.

DAY 1!
'Twas the night before OUA’s, and throughout Ontario
All the skiers were sleeping, it’s true don’t cha know;
The groomers were grooming the trails with great care,
In hopes that UW Nordic soon would be there;
The skiers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of snow-flakes danced in their heads;
And coach Colin in his belle-a-clava, and Justin in his slacks,
Were discussing the conditions and how they would wax,
OUA CLASSIC
The very next morning the skiers awoke,
Now please look closely for what you read is no joke.
Away from the start line Henry flew like a flash,
A few minutes later Andrew took off and crashed.
And the sun on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Reflected into Tim’s eyes so that he didn’t know,
It was six-eight on his bib and not an eight-nine,
And so he began five minutes behind!
Then little Ry-anne, so lively and quick,
Started just behind our good friend Der-rik.
More rapid than eagles these skiers they came,
And the crown whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Henry! now, Andrew! now, Tim and Vixen!
On, Derek! On Ry-anne! on, Alison and Blitzen!
(note the replacement of Kieran Jones, Nolan Beanlands, Martha Sutton and Heather Foley by generous donations from S. Claus)
To the top of the hill! Just don’t hit “the wall!”
Now tuck away! pole away! ski away all!"
As the classic races drew to a close and the skiers collapsed,
The crowd milled about and minutes elapsed,
Then up on the wall the results appeared with no sound,
And every man, woman and chipmunk soon gathered around.
With the bronze there was Henry a smile on his face
And in 7th was Andrew what a wonderful race.
Tim was in 21st, at least in UWNN’s collective mind,
But add five minutes and he fell a 20 more spots behind.
Derek pulled in at a great 22nd
And Ryan in 43rd brought up the end;
Alison carried the whole woman’s team on her back,
And after a fantastic race finished the middle of the pack.
The coaches eyes -- how they twinkled! their dimples how merry!
Their cheeks were like roses, and noses like a cherry!
Their droll little mouths were drawn up like a bow,
They were so happy with how their team performed on the snow;
But is was not over, the team stretched muscles already spent,
In just a few hours the classic relay would commence;
The CLASSIC RELAY
Tim wanted redemption so he would begin,
He took off so fast it was prob-ly a sin.
He strided so boldly, his poles were so strong
And he cruised in so smoothly, just singing a song;
A flick of his wrist and a tap to the bum,
Sent Andrew off in 6th and boy did he hum!
He spoke not a word, but went to work hard and fast,
And pulled into second; tagging Henry at last,
Henry lay his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up those hills he rose;
He sped to the finish, and his team gave a cheer,
For he was in first and no-one was near!
But I heard him exclaim, ere he skied into sight,
Merry OU’s to all, We’ll sleep like Babies tonight!

Race Day!!!

With most of the cross country skiing and Canadian attention focused on British Columbia (a haven for drug addicts), Vancouver (a crappy city full of rain, warm air and yuppies), and Whistler Olympic Park (beautiful sunshine, amazing tracks, and the best cross country skiers in the world) the UWNN is focused on something a little closer to home. The OUA Championships, held at Mono Nordic in Orangeville, Ontario.

Held Saturday February 20 and Sunday February 21st, the Championships feature a 5/10 km Classic Individual Start, followed by a 3 x 5 km Men’s Relay, a 3 x 2.5 km Women’s Relay, and finally on Sunday a 10/15 km Mass Start Skate.

The UW Nordic Team is primed and ready, coming off a reading week which involved the perfect tune up, as they are planning on peaking at exactly the right time. Stay tuned for results, because this is one Championships you won’t want to miss!

Eastern Canadian Championships Round 2 – *Ding* *Ding*

With the Individual Start racing out of the way, the UWNT turned their thoughts towards the mess that is mass start classic racing at Eastern Canadians. While the start grid was wide, deep and expertly groomed, the fact remained that each mass start was going to feature at least 50 participants. Mass starts are considered the most fun of any type of start in the cross country skiing arsenal for a few reasons – a whole lot of pretty spandex in one place, the potential for horrendous crashes and pileups, and in the men’s categories, too much testosterone packed into a small space. The UWNT exited the Purple Gorilla at Nakkertok Nordic Center with delusions of grandeur and the possibility of earning a spot on The Discovery Channel’s Destroyed in Seconds in mind.

 

 

How much fun does this look? Hint: A LOT.

 

The UWNT Women were first to go, however participation was limited. Heather Foley decided her race season had been furious and opted to remain on the sidelines, resting, avoiding skiing 15km, and taking awesome pictures of her teammates. Alison Stephenson gave the starting grid a shot, but ended up pulling the plug after the first 5 km, citing extreme tiredness as the cause. With the understanding that Sunday was going to be a suffer-fest, the UW men put on their hard hats and got to work. In the Junior Men 15 km, Tim Rhodes pushed aside heavy legs and slippery skis to finish as the 45th Junior Man, good enough for 11th OUA in the category. Nolan Beanlands overcame his irrational fear of mass starts, steep down hills and klister to ski to a strong 58th position, good enough for 15th OUA. Ryan McNamara, still suffering the effects of his 2-day cold, as well as being on classic skis for only the 8th time in his life turned in a spectacular race. The courageous rookie ended his day in 68th, or 17th on the OUA.

With the Junior’s out of the way, and Rhodes set up in his hammock, the Open Men prepped to ski 30 km with a little trepidation. For most, it was considered to be the toughest race of the season, and some, of their lives. Four laps of the 7.5 km loop which featured every prominent hill at Nakkertok sounded like the perfect way to spend a Sunday afternoon. While Henry Reich focused on getting with the right pack and turning in a respectable performance, others focused on the more immediate and pressing goal of making sure they consumed their feeds to avoid bonking and finishing before the bus left for Waterloo. The first lap featured a little Waterloo action – Reich jumped out fast, while Derek Hartman (that’s right ladies and gentlemen, he did start this one) and Kieran Jones avoided trouble for the first 2.5 km and conserved energy. Everything was going according to plan until the 4 km mark, when Hartman, striding up a hill in front of Jones, decided to cross his skis, poles, boots and tights and go headfirst into the tracks, snapping a pole. After struggling around the rest of the lap with a mismatched set of poles, Hartman ended his day early at 7.5 km. Meanwhile, Reich was cruising along, hanging in with a tough group. For a while it appeared Jones was setting up to end his day early, as his lethargic lap splits were not exactly setting the trail on fire, however 3 excellent feeds from Coach Justin Faulkner as well as conservative pacing resulted in a hot final lap, crossing the finish line well before bus departure time. As per usual, Reich ended with the fastest time, 17th in Open Men, or 4th OUA. Jones ended his day with a 36th in Open Men, or 14th OUA.

Selected Team Quotes:

Heather Foley: “Why would I want to race 15km?? That’s a really long way!”

Nolan Beanlands: “I want to go to the Olympics…”

Andrew Jeffrey: “Why are you talking to me?? I wasn’t even there!”

Justin Faulkner: “Am I allowed to run with the athletes when I do feeds?? I heard there is an FIS rule against it, and I desperately don’t want to get fined or end up in jail, which is what the FIS hands out for punishment.”

Derek Hartman: “Ofrrefoncrackcrashshshblaa – crap”

 

With Eastern’s wrapped up, the Purple Gorilla was loaded, bagels were consumed and passing out commenced. Next up for the UWNT – OUA Championships, hosted by the University of Guelph at Mono Nordic, in Orangeville, Ontario.

 

Again, for full results, please see Zone 4.

 

On the Phonograph: Wonderwall – Oasis. No explanation needed.

On the ‘Tube:

It’s a little dated, yes, but considering the accomplishment of Sara Renner this past weekend at the World Cup in Canmore, and the upcoming Winter Olympic Games, the UWNN team finds it appropriate. Enjoy, and get pumped up for the greatest 2 weeks in Canadian cross-country skiing history.

Snapshot:

 

What is wrong with this picture?? Is it as obvious as it seems?

UW Nordic Team Does Eastern Canadians – Round 1

This past weekend, January 30 and 31st, much like every other cross country skier and their Grandmother in Eastern Canada, the UW Nordic Team headed off to Ottawa, Ontario/Cantley, Quebec for a non-stop adrenaline-filled weekend, otherwise known as Eastern Canadian Championships.

The race weekend began much like any other – the team arrived at the University of Waterloo’s Physical Activites Complex doors to find a big purple bus with gorilla’s on the side, and members of Waterloo’s illustrious indoor track team on board. After a short discussion, in which several track athletes came to realize that the Purple Gorilla was in fact headed to an outdoor venue with an advertised high temperature of –18 degrees Celsius, the bus was left to the UW Nordic Team. The UWNT settled in comfortably for the short ride over to the University of Guelph to pick up our best friends, biggest rivals, and fantastic travelling companions, the University of Guelph Nordic Ski Team. Ed – Guelph team members reading this blog – this is an earnest statement, meant with the best intentions. Please avoid rancorous diatribes in the comments. Also, you have your own blog now, so go read it instead.

A Gorilla

 

  Purple

After a quiet ride in which quickly improving rookie Ry-An McNamara proved that it is in fact possible to be skunked in back to back games of cribbage, the Purple Gorilla disgorged it’s contents onto the bustling parking lot of Nakkertok, the site of Eastern Canadian Championships, located in Cantley, Quebec. Fortunately everyone brought their passports, so the border crossing between Quebec and Ontario went smoothly, with only one strip search of Tim Rhodes.

On the pre-ski day, Nakkertok was sunny, frigid, icy, and contained roughly 600 athletes jostling for space around the 5km and 7.5km loops creating an extremely fast and somewhat dangerous situation. The University Men prepped by skiing the 5km loop, of which they were to do two the following day, while the women only had to do one. As most of the team had never experienced the exhilaration/misery that is Nakkertok’s race trails, the first trip around the loop was an exciting one. Highlights included the skating rink at the bottom of Beep Beep, the pit in the stomach feeling from the multiple G’s experienced during the descent of Dirk’s Dive and the lactic-acid build up that occurs when herring-boning up Montee McCarthy.

But more importantly – race day! With temperatures suspected to be quite frigid on Saturday morning the race start was delayed until 11.00 AM. This presented the UWNT with the unprecedented bonus of being able to accrue a purely disgusting amount of pre-race sleep. As coaches and members of the Eastern Canadian’s Coordination and Volunteer staff were outraged to learn, the average amount of athlete sleep on Friday night was roughly 10 hours. Normally the downside of this ludicrous amount of sleep and lethargic start is the amount of time spent at the race site, however with the 600 competitors starting at 15 second intervals the incredibly efficient Nakkertok race organisation crew moved things along at a quick pace.

For Alison Stephenson (that’s with a ‘ph’), rookie, female, air miles collector and class attender extraordinaire, and Heather Foley, also rookie, also female, working on a degree in drug dealing and race car driving, a mere 5 km skate was in order. Although most admitted it was a little chilly, the UWNT women took off their warm ups, made sure their buffs were on, and got down to the serious business of racing. Stephenson, a product of Nakkertok Nordic’s racing program and a native of the Ottawa area used her familiarity with the course to finish 84th in Open Women (25th OUA). Foley, who has had a strong season returning to racing after a layoff (not pregnancy, despite popular opinion, women CAN take time off skiing for things besides procreating) showed she continues to improve, finishing 109th in Open Women (31st OUA).

Post race quotes:

Alison Stephenson: “It’s fast. No really, it is.”

 

Up next were the men, something the UWNT has several more of, but are significantly less important. The lads were instructed to do 10 km – two laps of the 5, and luckily everyone heeded those directions, as well as the common knowledge that wind briefs were to be considered worth their weight in gold. As has been the case all season, Henry Reich, over-age rookie and American, led the way, posting the 29th fastest time in Open Men (5th OUA). Reich was followed by Kieran Jones, who our readers should all be quite familiar with at this point, who placed a respectable 76th in Open Men (21st OUA). The first rookie finisher for the UWNT was Tim Rhodes, who also moonlights as team chef, team porter and team DJ, in 103rd Open Men (30th OUA). Nolan Beanlands, a second-year phenom with a coop job in Ottawa, a few tickets to the Olympics and an axe to grind followed shortly thereafter in 110 Open Men (33rd OUA). Ryan McNamara, a resent resident of Ottawa and rookie had recently contracted a nasty 2 day cold, but refused to be daunted by a little snot, posting a placing of 152 in Open Men (48th OUA). The injured Derek Hartman travelled with the team, however decided to take an extra day to rest for Sunday’s classic race. Andrew Jeffrey was also absent, selfishly choosing to further his career goals of saving lives and helping people instead.

Post race quotes:

Henry Reich: “Are we in Quebec right now??”

Kieran Jones: “My skis were so fast, it was like a slalom on those down hills I was going by so many people. Just call me Manny Osbourne-Paradis!”

Ryan McNamara: “My throat hurts.”

 

With the skate day all wrapped up, the team hit the bus, and headed back to the hotel for an afternoon of relaxing, snoozing, eating, or wondering why the heck all the Canadian buildings look so weird. Stay tuned for Day 2, which will actually get written.

 

Please note, all OUA results are unofficial. For full results please see Zone 4.

 

 

 

Confusing colloquialism: “Happy as a clam” ?? Why are clams happy? All they do is get eaten.

In the 8 Track: Human – The Killers. Sure, the line “Are we human, or are we dancers” doesn’t make sense, but since when does that matter in music?

On the ‘Tube: 

Newell X Ski from Andrew Newell on Vimeo.

That’s Andy Newell. THE Andy Newell, the USA’s best hope for a medal in cross country skiing in Vancouver. That would be the first medal a US man has won in the sport in 35 years. And he just back flipped on skinny skis. What was it that you did for the sport of cross country skiing recently??